Babywearing: An Aunt’s Perspective

Did you know that some babies absolutely insist on being held for incredibly long stretches of time?

I didn’t, until my sister gave birth to a baby who must be held. Not only was my niece a baby who must be held, but she was also very picky about who held her. Inexplicably, she insisted on Mama from day one.

This “separation anxiety” is not supposed to occur until six months, at the earliest. It was a bit of a cruel joke on my sister, a developmental psychologist who, every semester, explains to students that newborns shouldn’t show signs of separation anxiety!

Nevertheless, my weeks-old niece cried when she was held by one of the “mother’s helpers” my sister tried to employ. Instead of enjoying a cup of tea or a peaceful meal while the babysitter held the baby, my sister was forced back into the glider, babe in arms, while they did laundry or tried to help out somehow. Time to herself became virtually impossible. Babywearing was largely responsible for saving her sanity.

Enter The Sanity Saver

During my first visit after the birth of my niece, my sister told me that the baby was refusing to tolerate the stroller. Instead, she showed me a ring sling; it allowed my sister carry her new baby closely, outdoors and inside, while keeping her hands free. That morning, my sister and I were actually able to leave the house, walk to a coffee shop and drink our coffee without much fuss! During the walk there, the baby fell asleep, and during the walk home, she enjoyed staring up at her mother’s face, the sky, the trees. It was a lovely morning that would have been impossible without babywearing.

I suspect that my niece was a baby who must be held because she had terrible reflux. That baby spit up more than anyone thought possible. It must have been miserable for her! But when she was more or less upright, she felt better–gravity was on her side. The cradle position shown in the picture kept her in a relatively upright position and allowed both baby and mom to relax.

Working with the Grain – not Against

Even though it was difficult to keep my niece happy, I refused to call her a “difficult baby.” Our difficulties were never her defining characteristics. I have since met other babies who must be held. Their mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, cousins and childcare providers agree–without baby wearing, you will absolutely lose your mind trying to keep these babies happy. If you need some sanity preservation or know someone who does, I highly recommend purchasing or borrowing a ring sling. Because it is adjustable and easy to put on, a sling is a great place to start!